QUOTE OF THE DAY BEFORE TODAY

4 January 2002-->
"No! But I will dismantle the second penguine."

31 October 2000--
"I think it's funny that he's been drinking and you guys are sober and it's 2:45 in the morning and you're talking morals."

12 October 2000-->
"The capacators hold enough electricity to kill you for up to one year."

11 October 2000--
"Now I think this will work too, but I might have to practice it in my closet."

19 August 2000--
"If they're using smaller than 600x800, they have no business being on the net."

18 August 2000--
"Fourty years of democrats, mostly liberals, which back in my day we called communists."

6 January 2000--
"You couldn't agree on the rock so you sunk in the sand."

5 January 2000--
"I've had 18 straight whiskeys. I think that's the record."

4 January 2000--
"No! I am a LAND DWELLER!"

24 April 1999--
"The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable."

23 April 1999--
"Joe, I think it's gonna be okay."
"And what makes you think that?"
"Who knows where thoughts come from. They just appear."

21 April 1999--
"What some people call impossible are just things they haven't seen before."

19 April 1999--
"I do whatever my Rice Crispies tell me to."

17 April 1999--
"Newman."
"Yes?"
"What are you doing?"
"I'm thinking."
"Well think me up a cup of coffee and a chocolate donut with some of those little sprinkles on top, will you, as long as you're thinking."

15 April 1999--
"By God's design, we are a skin-kaliedoscope."

14 April 1999--
"The merely illegal we can do immediatley, the unconstitutional takes somewhat longer."

13 April 1999--
"The more easily you're amused, the happier you are, more of the time."

11 April 1999--
"They come in all colors of the rainbow; violet, lavendar, purple . . ."

9 April 1999--
"Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with something bigger and heavier."

8 April 1999--
"Do not be afraid of tomorrow. God is already there."

5 April 1999--
"Thanks for the pizza . . . I mean . . . um . . . ah . . . cake."

2 April 1999--
"I know up in heaven, you're not supposed to cry.
But I am almost sure there were tears in your eyes.
As Jesus took your hand and you stood before the Lord.
He said 'My child look around you, for great is your reward.'"

28 March 1999--
"I believe the word stunned comes to mind."

13 March 1999--
"We'd have more luck playing pick-up-sticks with our butt cheeks than we will getting a flight out of here by day break."

12 March 1999--
"Sometimes you've just gotta' want it more."

10 March 1999--
"I'll take whatever you can give 'cause I'm just happy to be with you."

8 March 1999--
"Satan's already lost!!!"

6 March 1999--
"Shoot for the stars, and hope to land in the trees."

5 March 1999--
"Match in the gas tank. Boom, boom."

2 March 1999--
"Our fifteen minutes got us about three and a half."

1 March 1999--
"My whole existance is a spirit foul. I'm a walking spirit foul."

26 February 1999--
"Big slice of heaven. Side order of fries."

25 February 1999--
"There are some things in life that just make us grin, smile, giggle, and laugh all over the place."

22 February 1999--
"What would you say to someone who, um, said to you this is a psychiatric hospital and that you are a patient here and that I am your psychiatrist?"
"I would say that he has a rather limited and uncreative way of looking at the situation."

11 February 1999--
"Stay in touch with my insanity."

10 February 1999--
"Half baked cookies in the oven
Half baked people on the bus
There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us."

8 February 1999--
"You never had a camera in my head."

16 January 1999--
"All day long people walked - some as many as 14 miles. And the busses stayed empty. Someone saw a very old woman hobbling down the street. 'Why didn't you stay home today, Granny?' he asked her. 'It wouldn't have made much difference. I'm not walking for myself,' she answered. 'I'm walking for my children and grandchildren.'"

15 January 1999--
"So tonight we must believe that a way will be found out of no way."

4 January 1999--
"Oh, there you are. I'm eating a donut!"

1 January 1999--
"Then tonight we're gonna' party like it's 1699."

11 December 1998--
"Today is Cheese Day!!!"

7 December 1998--
"She doesn't know. She has sometimers disease."

6 December 1998--
"What are you supposed to be, a clown or something?
Sometimes."

2 December 1998--
"I could no sooner choose a favorite star in the heavens."

24 November 1998--
"Gave up the oxygen habit."

23 November 1998--
"That's a Freudian Slip."
"What's a Freudian Slip?"
"That's when you say one thing, but you're thinking of a mother."

21 November 1998--
"Staggers the imagination."
"Makes me unique."
"What a plus."

18 November 1998--
"I know. It's like trying to nail Jell-o to the wall."

17 November 1998--
"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

16 November 1998--
"All I ever wanted was an honest weeks pay for an honest day's work."

12 November 1998--
"In my day, we had plenty of fun just throwing rocks at each other."

3 November 1998--
"Let a little of what I feel show through the cracks, the wise cracks.""

2 November 1998--
"Use what talents you possess. The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best."

28 October 1998--
"Oh, full of scorpions is my mind."

27 October 1998--
"We need to find the slices as a function of x. Usually you can't."

26 October 1998--
"The grass may be greener on the other side, but it still has to be mowed."

25 October 1998--
"I am but mad north-north-west. When the wind is southerly, I know a hawk from a handsaw."

23 October 1998--
"J- Woah, I sat on Shirley!
S- It's not the first time, won't be the last.
J- Did your older brothers sit on you when you were growing up?
S- No, I beat the $#!+ out of them!"

21 October 1998--
"What we've got here, is failure to comunicate."

20 October 1998--
"We kind of get everyone on an attention / deficite label. Then they can drug 'em up."

19 October 1998--
"Every day we have is one day more than we deserve."

18 October 1998--
"Look what I did! I made a cow!"

16 October 1998--
"What do you do with yourself these days?
I live, I work, I learned how to cook. I take walk, and watch sunsets."

14 October 1998--
"Margery's wingspan's all feathers and coke cans, and
TV dinners and letters she won't send, and
Every race night is shot through with sunlight
trying to hit the big one one last time tonight. . .
for drunken fathers and stupid mothers and
boys who cant tell one girl from another
So she takes her pills
Careful and round
One of these days she's gonna throw the whole bottle down

But she's trying to be a good girl
and give 'em what they want
But Margery's dreaming of . . ."

13 October 1998--
"Thus it may in principle be true that the position assigned to women in Greek society (and indeed in other societies) entails a gross waste of the talents of 'one half of the human race.'"

12 October 1998--
"The difference between insanity and genius is measured only by success."

29 September 1998--
"Many people complain that life never gave them any chances. We are given life, we must take the chances."

24 September 1998--
"Don't worry, Jesus loves you no matter how physically challenged you are."

18 September 1998--
"Well, well, try anything once, come hot, come cold!
If we're not foolish young, we're foolish old."

17 September 1998--
"It's like living in an insane assylum on the guard's day off."

15 September 1998--
"It's like doing stand-up after Robin Williams."

8 September 1998--
"Would you look at all those stars! I mean, you look up and you think, God made all of that, and he still remembered to make a little speck like me."

7 September 1998--
"You're gonna have to learn there's a little Homer Simpson in each of us."

6 September 1998--
"You have to look with better eyes than that."

5 September 1998--
"Mr. Whorley, you ever have folks fighting over you?"
"No"
"It sure feel good!"

4 September 1998--
"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do!?!"

17 May 1998--
"A green chicken's better than no chicken, that's what I say."

16 May 1998--
"For being any kind of a romantic. . .
even a hopeless one."

15 May 1998--
"There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives."

13 May 1998--
"Your heart is free. Have the courage to follow her."

12 May 1998--
"I don't suffer from insanity: I enjoy every minute of it."

11 May 1998--
"I would soon destroy a stain glass window as an artist like yourself."

10 May 1998--
"Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children."

9 May 1998--
"Well, I say you can dance to anything, as long as you feel like dancing."

8 May 1998--
"And the waitress is practicing politics, while the business man slowly gets stoned.
They're sharing a drink they call lonelyness, but it''s better than drinking alone."

7 May 1998--
"Your blue might be grey,
Your less might be more,
Your window to the world might be your own front door,
Your shiniest day might come in the middle of the night."

6 May 1998--
Polonius: "My Lord, I will use them according to their desert."
Hamlet: "Odd's bodikin, men; better. Use every man after his dessert, and who shall 'scape whipping? Use them after your own honor and dignity. The less they deserve, the more merit is in your bounty."

5 May 1998--
"Jesus answered and said unto them, 'Verily I say unto you, if ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto the mountain, be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done.
And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall recieve.'"

4 May 1998--
"Happiness isn't getting what you want, it is wanting what you get."

3 May 1998--
"So come loose your life for a carpenter's son, for a madman who died for a dream."

2 May 1998--
"Every way of a man is right in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits."

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